Sunday, July 31, 2011

St. Christopher

St. Christopher
1485-1499
Detail of an illuminated Flemish Book of Hours
University of Texas at Austin, USA

OMG St. Christopher has a hipster beard and haircut! All he needs now is a flannel and an ironic t-shirt and he'll be taking Squishy to Pitchfork!

Wednesday, July 27, 2011

Galaktotrophousa

Galaktotrophousa
By Master Ioanni
1778
Onassis Foundation

Er, is Mary nursing Squishy from her bicep??????

Sunday, July 24, 2011

St. Christopher and the Infant Christ

St. Christopher and the Infant Christ
By Domenico Ghirlandaio
1400's
Fresco, 112 x 59"
The Metropolitan Museum of Art, New York

ST. CHRISTOPHER TO SQUISHY: As soon as I get you across this river what do you say we start a gay bowling league?

Saturday, July 23, 2011

The Circumcision of Christ

The Circumcision of Christ
Detail of an illumination from a French book of hours, 7 x 5 "

Confidential to the Rabbi, you're holding the knife backwards....

Wednesday, July 20, 2011

The Holy Family

The Holy Family
12th Century
Detail of a fresco in the Église Saint Martin de Vic, France

Lookin' sharp with the Mother and Son matching blush and brows.

Sunday, July 17, 2011

Birth of Christ

Birth of Christ
1200's
Detail of a mosaic ceiling in the Baptistery of Florence, Italy

MARY: I gave birth to the son of God so now I get to go on a magic carpet ride. Wheeee!!!!!

GOD: (Writing in his holy note pad) This is supposed to be my son? Excuse me people but the son of God
is not a balding larvae!

Thursday, July 14, 2011

The Presentation in the Temple


Presentation in the Temple
By Taddeo Gaddi
Painting on panel
Accadamia Gallery, Florence

MARY TO RABBI: Damn, give him back already! I just wanted to present Squishy, not get him lost in your beard!

Wednesday, July 13, 2011

Madonna and Child

Madonna and Child
Artist unknown
Tempera on wood panel

Mary: your knees are totes amazeballs!

Squishy: better do something about your neck goiter.

Sunday, July 10, 2011

Virgin and Child Enthroned with Scenes from the Life of the Virgin

Virgin and Child Enthroned with Scenes from the Life of the Virgin
By an unknown Spanish artist
1400-1500
Detail of a panel
The Metropolitan Museum of Art, New York

I don't get it: why does one king get the fancy ass star halo and the other kings get nothing?

Friday, July 8, 2011

The Holy Family

The Holy Family
1440
Detail of an illumination from the Hours of Catherine of Cleves

HOLY SHIZNIT! Squishy's got a baby walker!!!!!!!!

Thursday, July 7, 2011

Lactation of Saint Pedro Nolasco

Lactation of Saint Pedro Nolasco (detail)
By Ignacio Chacón
Oil on canvas
Monastry La Merced in Cuzco, Peru

Remember everyone: sharing is caring!

Saturday, July 2, 2011

Madonna and Child Nursing

Madonna and Child Nursing
By an unknown Flemish Artist
Early 1500's
Oil on wood
Honolulu Acadamy of Arts, USA

Neck-boob slash goiter. Wha???????