Inspiration of St. Luke

Inspiration of St. Luke
By Hermen Rode
1484
Painting on wood
Sankt-Annen Museum, Lubek

Mommy, how come the flying cow get's a halo and I don't? I WANNA HALO LIKE THE FLYING COW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Triptych

Triptych (detail)
By Bernardo Daddi
1335-40
Tempera on wood
Lindenau-Museum, Altenburg

You are born the king of the Rubber Arm Long Finger family. Represent us well, son.

The Holy Family

The Holy Family
By Giovanni Luteri detto Dosso Dossi
1486/87


We've got some big daddy butt boost goin' down. Hellz yeah!

The Virgin and Child with Musician Angels and the Holy Trinity

The Virgin and Child with Musician Angels and the Holy Trinity

By Lazzaro Bastiani

1475 c.
79,7 x 55,4 cm

Museo Poldi Pezzoli, Milan

Now listen to me mom. I AM THE LEAD SINGER of this band and I GET TO WEAR THE GOLD CROWN!

The Holy Family

The Holy Family
By a follower of Bernardino Luini
Oil on canvas (laid on panel), 74.2 x 57 cm
Maidstone Museum and Bentlif Art Gallery, Kent, UK

Might need to start an Upside Down Question Mark Jesus tag, ya think?

Madonna of Humility

Madonna of Humility
By Lorenzo Monaco
c. 1420
Panel, 22,8 x 17,8 cm
Thorvaldsens Museum, Copenhagen

So helpful of Squishy to assist mom by squeezing the zit on her neck..........oh, never mind, sorry, that's actually her breast.

The Infant Christ Giving Emblems of the Passion to Carmelite Saints

The Infant Christ Giving Emblems of the Passion to Carmelite Saints
By an unknown Spanish artist
About 1726
Oil on canvas, 160.5 x 118.5 cm
The Bowes Museum, Barnard Castle, Co. Durham

Coming to you from a catwalk in Paris, Squishy models the latest in transparent-robe-with-angel-head-hairpiece. Hellz yeah, this is a FASHION DO, people!

Adoration of the Magi

Adoration of the Magi
By Conrad von Soest
1420
Tempera on wood, 140 × 95 cm
St. Mary's Church, Dortmund

GUY ON LEFT: Damn Jesus--what happened to your junk???? Looks like you're missing a couple essential details there.

SQUISHY: I backhand you for your impertinence, you long-nose scum.

MARY: I get the biggest halo. Ha ha ha, losers!

KNEELING FOOT KISSER: Hmmm, smells like incense, tastes like chicken.

GUY IN BLACK COAT: Hope no one notices I'm wearing a toupee.....

Madonna and Child with Infant St John

Madonna and Child with Infant St John

By Tommaso Manzuoli

1560 - 70

Oil on panel, 77 x 61 cm

Birmingham Museum and Art Gallery

SAINT JOHN: I have a vision. We totally need to redecorate this manger! I'm thinking leopord prints and recessed lighting.

SQUISHY: Fierce!

The Madonna and Child with an Angel Holding a Basket of Fruit

The Madonna and Child with an Angel Holding a Basket of Fruit
By Michele Ciampanti
Tempera, 28 x 16.4 in. / 71 x 41.6 cm.

Cue The Beach Boys for Squishy's first surfing lesson!

Madonna with Child, Sts Giovannino and Barbara

Madonna with Child, Sts John and Barbara
By Daniele da Volterra
c. 1548
Oil on canvas
Private collection

Here we see Squishy and Mary discreetly unroll a scroll, while Saint John reads:

Dear Saint Barbara,

You are experiencing a wardrobe malfunction and may wish to adjust your top.

All the best,

Squishy, Mary and Saint J.

Virgin, Child and Saint Anne

Virgin, Child and Saint Anne
By Barna da Siena
Princeton University Art Museum

Happy Easter from Scary Granny Annie, Little Mary, Weird Ear Squishy Jesus and, most of all, Teeny Tiny Lady (below Squishy's toes.)

Adoration of the Magi

Adoration of the Magi
By Guido da Siena
1270s
Tempera on wood, 34 x 46 cm
Lindenau-Museum, Altenburg

Magi (left): we've heard a prophecy that the king of Jews was born today. We present him gifts of hamburgers.

Magi (kneeling): I kiss the foot of the miraculously old baby!

Madonna and Child with St Ignatius of Antioch and St Onophrius (detail)

Madonna and Child with St Ignatius of Antioch and St Onophrius (detail)
By Lorenzo Lotto
1508
Oil on wood
Galleria Borghese, Rome

....in which St Onophrius hands Squishy a suspiciously vaginal piece of fruit.

Madonna of the Passion

Madonna of the Passion
By Carlo Crivelli
c. 1460
Tempera on wood, 71 × 48 cm
Museo di Castelvechio, Verona

The true joy of this painting is in the details. And what details!! First of all, what's with the tiny people? Note the lardy penitent with the cross and the black diaper. And WTF: the naked boy on the left grasping the pillar--Holy MANGINA!

Madonna and Child with Saint Joseph and an Angel

Madonna and Child with Saint Joseph and an Angel
By Raffaellino del Garbo
Tempera on canvas, transferred from wood; 22 x 15 in. The Metropolitan Museum of Art, New York




Squishy: Got me some booby!!!!

Joseph: Wish I had me some.

Angel: Pervs.....

Virgin and Child

Virgin and Child
By Michele Giambono
c. 1450
Panel, 27 x 60 cm
Galleria Franchetti, Ca' d'Oro, Venice

Hey there God? Dad? Do you have a moment? See, my head's on backward, could you please assist? Pretty please?

Madonna with Child and John the Baptist

Madonna with Child and John the Baptist
By Francesco d'Ubertino
c.1540-1550








SQUISHY CENTERFOLD!

Madonna and Child

Madonna and Child
By Carlo Crivelli
San Diego Museum of Art

Hey Mom, could you please not hug me so hard? You're making my halo fall off.

The Virgin and Child

The Virgin and Child
By an anonymous Flemish Artist
c. 1500
Oil on panel, 36.8 x 28.5 cm
Rijksmuseum, Amsterdam




Mary's breast: conveniently located on the corner of neck and collar bone.