Madonna Adoring the Child

Madonna Adoring the Child
From the workshop of Ghirlandaio
Around 1465
Oil on panel, 55 x 36.5 cm
Bowes Museum, Barnard Castle, Agnews, London

Yeah, so Mary has some gigantic hands here, but then look at Jesus....damn! Was he painted by Botero?

Virgin and Child with Saints

Virgin and Child with Saints
By Fernando Yáñez de la Almedina
140 x 119 cm
Prado Museum, Madrid

Oh noes, not the jazz hands again!

The Holy Family with the Infant Saint John the Baptist

The Holy Family with the Infant Saint John the Baptist
By an artist in the school of Raphael
Oil on panel, 92.5 x 63.5 cm
National Galleries of Scotland

Darling, do I have anything in my teeth?

Virgin Lactans

Virgin Lactans
1784
Byzantine Museum, Thessaloniki, Greece

Happy Mother's Day from Squishy J to all the beautiful moms out there (even those of you who have a breast growing from your bicep.....)

Virgin de la Leche with Christ Child and St. Bernard Clairvaux

Virgin de la Leche with Christ Child and St.
Bernard Clairvaux
By an unknown artist from Peru
1680
Oil on canvas, 47" x 39"
Peyton Wright Gallery, Santa Fe

Twofer!

Madonna and Child with Saints

Madonna and Child with Saints
By Giovanni Di Paolo
15th century
Tempera on panel

Let us pray:

Dear Lord,

We thank you for sending us your son, and we hate to mention silly details, but, well, he is a bit on the large side for a baby. This makes it rather difficult for us to hold him in this painting. Since we all praying so piously and we have such nice butt chins, could you kindly downsize him just a little bit?

Amen.

xxxoooo, Mary and Saints

Garland of Fruit with the Infants Christ and Saint John the Baptist

Garland of Fruit with the Infants Christ and Saint John the Baptist
By Frans Snyders
Oil on canvas

So what do we have here? A Squishy baby pile underneath a garland of fruit, make that the very suggestive garland of fruit......

Inspiration of St. Luke

Inspiration of St. Luke
By Hermen Rode
1484
Painting on wood
Sankt-Annen Museum, Lubek

Mommy, how come the flying cow get's a halo and I don't? I WANNA HALO LIKE THE FLYING COW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Triptych

Triptych (detail)
By Bernardo Daddi
1335-40
Tempera on wood
Lindenau-Museum, Altenburg

You are born the king of the Rubber Arm Long Finger family. Represent us well, son.

The Holy Family

The Holy Family
By Giovanni Luteri detto Dosso Dossi
1486/87


We've got some big daddy butt boost goin' down. Hellz yeah!

The Virgin and Child with Musician Angels and the Holy Trinity

The Virgin and Child with Musician Angels and the Holy Trinity

By Lazzaro Bastiani

1475 c.
79,7 x 55,4 cm

Museo Poldi Pezzoli, Milan

Now listen to me mom. I AM THE LEAD SINGER of this band and I GET TO WEAR THE GOLD CROWN!

The Holy Family

The Holy Family
By a follower of Bernardino Luini
Oil on canvas (laid on panel), 74.2 x 57 cm
Maidstone Museum and Bentlif Art Gallery, Kent, UK

Might need to start an Upside Down Question Mark Jesus tag, ya think?

Madonna of Humility

Madonna of Humility
By Lorenzo Monaco
c. 1420
Panel, 22,8 x 17,8 cm
Thorvaldsens Museum, Copenhagen

So helpful of Squishy to assist mom by squeezing the zit on her neck..........oh, never mind, sorry, that's actually her breast.

The Infant Christ Giving Emblems of the Passion to Carmelite Saints

The Infant Christ Giving Emblems of the Passion to Carmelite Saints
By an unknown Spanish artist
About 1726
Oil on canvas, 160.5 x 118.5 cm
The Bowes Museum, Barnard Castle, Co. Durham

Coming to you from a catwalk in Paris, Squishy models the latest in transparent-robe-with-angel-head-hairpiece. Hellz yeah, this is a FASHION DO, people!

Adoration of the Magi

Adoration of the Magi
By Conrad von Soest
1420
Tempera on wood, 140 × 95 cm
St. Mary's Church, Dortmund

GUY ON LEFT: Damn Jesus--what happened to your junk???? Looks like you're missing a couple essential details there.

SQUISHY: I backhand you for your impertinence, you long-nose scum.

MARY: I get the biggest halo. Ha ha ha, losers!

KNEELING FOOT KISSER: Hmmm, smells like incense, tastes like chicken.

GUY IN BLACK COAT: Hope no one notices I'm wearing a toupee.....

Madonna and Child with Infant St John

Madonna and Child with Infant St John

By Tommaso Manzuoli

1560 - 70

Oil on panel, 77 x 61 cm

Birmingham Museum and Art Gallery

SAINT JOHN: I have a vision. We totally need to redecorate this manger! I'm thinking leopord prints and recessed lighting.

SQUISHY: Fierce!

The Madonna and Child with an Angel Holding a Basket of Fruit

The Madonna and Child with an Angel Holding a Basket of Fruit
By Michele Ciampanti
Tempera, 28 x 16.4 in. / 71 x 41.6 cm.

Cue The Beach Boys for Squishy's first surfing lesson!

Madonna with Child, Sts Giovannino and Barbara

Madonna with Child, Sts John and Barbara
By Daniele da Volterra
c. 1548
Oil on canvas
Private collection

Here we see Squishy and Mary discreetly unroll a scroll, while Saint John reads:

Dear Saint Barbara,

You are experiencing a wardrobe malfunction and may wish to adjust your top.

All the best,

Squishy, Mary and Saint J.

Virgin, Child and Saint Anne

Virgin, Child and Saint Anne
By Barna da Siena
Princeton University Art Museum

Happy Easter from Scary Granny Annie, Little Mary, Weird Ear Squishy Jesus and, most of all, Teeny Tiny Lady (below Squishy's toes.)

Adoration of the Magi

Adoration of the Magi
By Guido da Siena
1270s
Tempera on wood, 34 x 46 cm
Lindenau-Museum, Altenburg

Magi (left): we've heard a prophecy that the king of Jews was born today. We present him gifts of hamburgers.

Magi (kneeling): I kiss the foot of the miraculously old baby!