Wednesday, March 31, 2010

Madonna and Child with St Ignatius of Antioch and St Onophrius (detail)

Madonna and Child with St Ignatius of Antioch and St Onophrius (detail)
By Lorenzo Lotto
1508
Oil on wood
Galleria Borghese, Rome

....in which St Onophrius hands Squishy a suspiciously vaginal piece of fruit.

Sunday, March 28, 2010

Madonna of the Passion

Madonna of the Passion
By Carlo Crivelli
c. 1460
Tempera on wood, 71 × 48 cm
Museo di Castelvechio, Verona

The true joy of this painting is in the details. And what details!! First of all, what's with the tiny people? Note the lardy penitent with the cross and the black diaper. And WTF: the naked boy on the left grasping the pillar--Holy MANGINA!


Thursday, March 25, 2010

Madonna and Child with Saint Joseph and an Angel

Madonna and Child with Saint Joseph and an Angel
By Raffaellino del Garbo
Tempera on canvas, transferred from wood; 22 x 15 in. The Metropolitan Museum of Art, New York




Squishy: Got me some booby!!!!

Joseph: Wish I had me some.

Angel: Pervs.....

Sunday, March 21, 2010

Virgin and Child

Virgin and Child
By Michele Giambono
c. 1450
Panel, 27 x 60 cm
Galleria Franchetti, Ca' d'Oro, Venice

Hey there God? Dad? Do you have a moment? See, my head's on backward, could you please assist? Pretty please?

Saturday, March 20, 2010

Madonna with Child and John the Baptist

Madonna with Child and John the Baptist
By Francesco d'Ubertino
c.1540-1550








SQUISHY CENTERFOLD!

Wednesday, March 17, 2010

Madonna and Child

Madonna and Child
By Carlo Crivelli
San Diego Museum of Art

Hey Mom, could you please not hug me so hard? You're making my halo fall off.

Saturday, March 13, 2010

The Virgin and Child

The Virgin and Child
By an anonymous Flemish Artist
c. 1500
Oil on panel, 36.8 x 28.5 cm
Rijksmuseum, Amsterdam




Mary's breast: conveniently located on the corner of neck and collar bone.

Thursday, March 11, 2010

Holy Family with the Young St John the Baptist

Holy Family with the Young St John the Baptist
By Piero di Cosimo
c. 1520
Panel, 119 x 87 cm
Collezione Vittorio Cini, Venice

Now Jesus, I want you to hold the Bible and repeat after me "I Squishy J do solemnly swear that, to the best of my abilities, I will someday grow up to look exactly like Richard Simmons. Amen"

And, Saint John, don't think I can't see you there in the corner making a slingshot out of your cross.



Sunday, March 7, 2010

Adoration of the Magi

Adoration of the Magi
By Andrea Mantegna
1495-1505

Look, I drink BREAST MILK. Get that freaky magi juice away from me baldy!

Friday, March 5, 2010

The Adoration of the Shepherds

The Adoration of the Shepherds
By Matthias Stomer
about 1635-40
Oil on canvas
44 5/8 x 63 5/8"
North Carolina Museum of Art, USA

Oh yeeesssss! The angel said he would be the son of God, but he didn't mention we were getting a free space heater too!